again with the crazy....

i'm so sorry. i know it's probably boring to anyone else but me but i am CONSUMED with thoughts of pregnancy and have an addiction to staring at my chart and comparing it to other people's charts - it's a problem and i think i may need a support group.

hi, my name is shirley and i am a chart addict. (hi, shirley.)...... sigh.

so here's the deal. my chart is looking **good** -- like we did the deed when we were supposed to and my temps are high and as of today my chart almost leads me to believe it's triphasic (!!!) and when i compare it to other charts that end in pregnancy my heart flutters.

for example:

my line is the purple one and the mysterious pregnant girls whose charts these are have the green line

see what i mean?! one would think that i am right on track to pee on a stick and get a positive result. well...

i did and i didn't.

and yes, it's early still (early like "i'm a fool for wasting that test" early) but i can't help myself!

here's the real kicker: i have no symptoms. none. zip. zilch.

well, that's not entirely true. i have had freaky dreams and some weird cramping in my uterine area. i'm eating everything in sight and taking naps. but in all honesty, those last two are just an everyday occurrence for me! oh, and i did freak out and cry a lot yesterday... but i think that was reasonable with all of the pressure i've been under with 5 new clients trying to get in on my schedule in the past week and my mom & sister just now telling me my niece's 3rd birthday party is this weekend when i've already promised myself to a friend's bday celebration on the same day... i feel like such a bad auntie :(

anyway, i just need to chill. why don't they make chill pills!?! oh wait, they do and they're called valium and i won't go near them! so i'm off to take another nap and stuff my face and wait anxiously to go to bed tonight so i can wake up tomorrow and check my temp. and i swear to god, if it continues to rise there will be no home pregnancy test that will be safe from me peeing on it!

this is going to get expensive.

ps - that evil bitch, fertilityfriend.com, has added unnecessary fuel to the fire by telling me that if i am by some long shot preggers then my due date is my birthday. bitches.