Dear Uterus, JUST DO IT! Love, Nike

Having the baby conversation with two of my clients/friends who have teenagers and know plenty well the pains in the asses kids can be (and as they send theirs off to private colleges, how expensive too), the conversation ended just as quickly as it began when both basically told me to shut up and just do it already. I hear this a lot. (because it's so easy and simple and inexpensive, right?)
And it's okay from them because I love and respect them and know the place they are coming from but
you wanna know what else I hear a lot and am not so cool with?!: "When are you going to have a baby?" "It's about time you had a little one!" "You look like a natural holding that baby *wink*"..., and a multitude of other ways people basically look at me and say "TICK TOCK!" (we've discussed this, but people are so effing rude. What if were uterusless [awesome new word, btw]? Also, when did the world determine there weren't enough people on the planet? We are not facing an infant shortage the last time I checked.)
Well guess what folks?! It may not be up to me. My body may not be on board that baby train... ever. I think that if I am completely honest, half the time I have an outward debate about choosing or not choosing to have a baby or defend the fact that I don't already have one, I am stalling. I put up these defenses because it is socially unacceptable for me to blurt out that for the past nine months we've given it a go (albeit half-heartedly) and nada is happening.
Why do I have to be the one who feels uneasy and socially awkward when *they* are the ones asking me ridiculously personal questions like they are asking me if I like chocolate or vanilla icecream (I like both, FYI). (you are wrong. it's vanilla, clearly.)
I think I like the comedianne Megan Mooney's reply "Well, we tried five times last night". She reasons that if they are going to make her uncomfortable, she has the right to make them feel uncomfortable as well. (yes! would love to see the looks of discomfort on their faces!)
Ah yes, if only we could make the decision and then instruct my baby-making parts to "just do it"... if only.
--Shirley

-- Post From My iPhone